3 … 2 … 1 … Liftoff!

Tonight’s a big night for me, as skyfisher has its official book launch party. As a first-time author, it’s all weird and wonderful, but it did get me wondering. What is the proper technique for launching a book anyway? The internet was no help. Conventional wisdom has it that books should now be launched online. I’m not sure I agree with that. I love the virtual world, but a flight simulator will not get you to Florida.

 

Still, I figured I was equipped with the fundamental skills necessary to launch a book. I’ve had basic flight training. I studied engineering. Admittedly I was rejected by the Canadian Astronaut program – apparently not having two doctorates plus a jet pilot rating is considered a liability – but despite that, I have accumulated some understanding of propulsion technology. And, of course, I do have practical hands on experience with flying discs.

The aerodynamics of the book had me a little puzzled at first. You’d almost think that a book could just turn over and flap away on its own, like a bird, but apparently that’s only true of Harry Potter books.

It seems to me that the payload-to-thrust ratio is what’s key here. Make a book too light, too full of fluff and pap, and it’ll just waft away on the first stiff breeze. Make a book too heavy– weigh it down with an overabundance of ponderous philosophy and pedantic self-indulgent prose – and it’ll take a Saturn rocket to get it off the ground. So, I believe it’s all about finding the proper balance of readability and profundity.

It did seem to me that, just as a human cannot fly without mechanical assistance, so a book cannot take off on its own. Among other things, it needs to be properly packaged, in order to eliminates drag and resistance. And finally, if you’re going to put a book out there, it takes all the strength and faith – call it a wing and a prayer – the author can offer.

Incoming!